my mom was driving me back from school for spring break tonight. her, dad, and i just had a nice meal at perkins and everything was going great for once. no arguing, nice conversation, actual laughing. now for the car ride: i was peacefully reading a page-turner of a book in the heated passenger seat with my ipod on. dad is dozing in the backseat, hat over his eyes. all of the sudden, my peripheral vision picks up the headlights from an 18-wheeler getting closer and coming up FAST in the side mirror. i turn around an see that he is just feet away from us. i am hysterically screaming to my mom things like: “get in the other lane!”, “he’s on our ass!” and “we’re going to die!” but it’s as if she’s frozen. she keeps yelling that she’s doing the speed limit (40 mph) and doesn’t know why the truck driver is doing about 60. she also doesn’t seem to understand that our little red Suburu, with all of us in it, are about to be under all 18 wheels of the careering mess behind us, probably also smashing into the concrete divider and the car on the other side of us, if she doesn’t act real quick. in my entire life, i have never been more desperate or scared. i screamed so hard that i know my throat is still going to be raw tomorrow, but i don’t give a shit. those few seconds were so unbearably slow, just all three of us screaming at each other and the tractor trailer laying on his horn. it was like something out of a bad movie. i’m the only one who is turned around, seeing him getting closer and closer and just thinking “oh my god, we are all going to die.” the neurons in my mom’s brain finally fire after what seems like an eternity and she speeds up to get in front of the car in the other lane. after the danger had passed and the tractor trailer flew past us, i sobbed my eyes out and wailed. ever since i was a little kid, i have been terrified of being run over by a tractor trailer while coming down the mountain. i would literally stay turned around in my seat until all the trucks had passed us. at this moment, i felt like i was about 6 again.

afterwards, i tried to calm myself down, thanked God for saving us, and tried to focus on listening to my music, which was nearly impossible. when i shut my eyes, all i could picture were the mangled, bloody bodies of my mom, dad, and me. i know i’m going to have some horrible nightmares tonight. i hugged my dad so hard when we got home, and then went to bury my face in my cat’s understanding fur.

i’m so thankful that we’re all alive right now..